menu_book Chapter 2

chapter two a nocturnal adventure i having exchanged the clock for seven shillings and badly beaten the pawnbroker's assistant in a verbal duel bindle strolled along towards wallom street in the happiest frame of mind the night was young it was barely nine o'clock and his whole being yearned for some adventure he was still preoccupied with the subject of larceny his wits bindle argued were of little or no use in the furniture removing business where mediocrity formed the standard of excellence there would never be a napoleon of furniture removers but there had been several napoleons of crime if a man were endowed with genius he should also be supplied with a reasonable outlet for it walking meditatively along the north end road he was awakened to realities by his foot suddenly striking against something that jingled he stooped and picked up two keys attached to a ring which he swiftly transferred to one of his pockets and passed on

some one might be watching him two minutes later he drew forth his find for examination attached to the ring was a metal tablet upon which were engraved the words these keys are the property of professor sylvanus thirteen audrey mansions queen's club west kensington w reward for the return two shillings sixpence the keys were obviously those of the outer door of a block of mansions and the door of a flat if they were returned the reward was two shillings and sixpence which would bring up the day's takings to nine shillings and sixpence if on the other hand the keys were retained for the purpose of at that moment bindle's eye caught sight of a ticket upon a stall littered with old locks and keys above which blazed and spluttered a paraffin torch keys cut while you wait it announced without a moment's hesitation he slipped the two keys from their ring and held them out to the proprietor of the stall ow much to make two like em mate he inquired the man took the keys examined them for a moment and replied one an threepence from you captain well think o me as a pretty girl an say a bob an it's done replied bindle

the man regarded him with elaborate gravity for a few moments if you turn your face away you'll try he replied and proceeded to fashion the duplicates meanwhile bindle deliberated if he retained the keys there would be suspicion at the flats and perhaps locks would be changed if on the other hand the keys were returned immediately the owner would trouble himself no further at this juncture he was not very clear as to what he intended to do he was still undecided when the four keys were handed to him in return for a shilling the mind of joseph bindle invariably responded best to the ministrations of beer and when half an hour later he left the bar of the purple goat his plans were formed and his mind made up he vaguely saw the hand of providence in this discovery of professor conti's keys and he was determined that providence should not be disappointed in him joseph bindle

at first he bought a cheap electric torch guaranteed for twelve or twenty-four hours the shopkeeper was not quite certain which then proceeding to a chemist's shop he purchased a roll of medical bandaging with this he retired up a side street and proceeded to swathe his head and the greater part of his face leaving only his eyes nose and mouth visible drawing his cap carefully over the bandages he returned to the highway first having improvised the remainder of the bandaging into an informal sling for his left arm not even mrs bindle herself would have recognized him so complete was the disguise ten minutes later he was at audrey mansions no one was visible and with great swiftness and dexterity he tried the duplicate keys in the open outer door one fitted perfectly mounting to the third floor he inserted the other in the door of number thirteen the lock turned easily quite satisfied he replaced them in his pocket and rang the bell there was no answer he rang again and a third time but without result that's his own charrin murmured bindle laconically and descended to the ground floor where he rang the porter's bell with the result that the keys were faithfully redeemed

bindle left the porter in a state of suppressed excitement over a vivid and circumstantial account of a terrible collision that had just taken place in the neighbourhood between a motor-bus and a fire-engine resulting in eleven deaths including three firemen whilst thirty people had been seriously injured including six firemen he himself had been on the front seat of the motor-bus and had escaped with a broken head and a badly cut hand two professor conti did not discover his loss until the porter handed him his keys inquiring at the same time if the professor had heard anything of the terrible collision between the motor-bus and fire-engine the professor had not he mounted to his flat with heavy steps he was tired and dispirited in his bedroom he surveyed himself mournfully in the mirror as he undid the buckle of his ready-made evening tie which he placed carefully in the green cardboard box upon the dressing-table in these days a tie had to last the week aided by the application of french chalk to the salient folds and corners professor sylvanus conti who had been known to his mother mrs wilkins as willie emphasized in feature and speech his cockney origin

he was of medium height with a sallow complexion not the sallowness of the sun-baked plains of italy but rather that of bermondsey or bow he had been a brave little man in his fight with adverse conditions years before chance had thrown across his path a doctor whose hypnotic powers had been his ruin willie wilkins had shown himself an apt pupil and there opened out to his vision a great and glorious prospect first he courted science but she had proved a fickle jade and he was forced to become an entertainer much against his inclination in time the name of professor sylvanus conti came to be known at most of the second-rate music halls as a good hypnotic turn to use the professional phraseology one consolation he had he never descended to tricks if he were unable to place a subject under control he stated so frankly he was scientific and believed in his own powers as he believed in nothing else on earth he had achieved some sort of success it was not what he had hoped for still it was a living it gave him food and raiment and a small bachelor flat he was a bachelor all self-made men are in a spot that was kensington albeit west kensington

the professor continued mechanically to prepare himself for the night he oiled his dark hair brushed his black moustache donned his long nightshirt and finally lit a cigarette he was thinking deeply his dark cunning little eyes flashed angrily a cynical smile played about the corners of his mouth half hidden by the bristly black moustache only that evening he had heard that his rival mr john gibson the english mesmerist had secured a contact to appear at some syndicate halls that had hitherto engaged only him this man gibson had been dodging conti for months past the barefaced effrontery of the fellow added fuel to the fire of his rival's anger to use an english name for a hypnotic turn upon the english music-hall stage he should have known that hypnotism like the equestrian and dressmaking arts is continental without exception or qualification yet this man john gibson the english mesmerist had dared to enter into competition with him professor sylvanus conti gibson descended to tricks which placed him beyond the pale of science he had confederates who as gentlemen among the audience

did weird and marvellous things, all to the glory of the English mesmerist. Still brooding upon a rather ominous future, the professor wound his watch, a fine gold hunter that had been presented to him three years previously by a few friends and admirers, and placed it upon the small table by his bedside, together with his money and other valuables. Then, carefully extinguishing his half-smoked cigarette, he got into bed.

It was late, and he was tired. A sense of injustice was insufficient to keep him awake for long, and switching off the electric light, he was soon asleep. From a dream in which he had just discomfited his rival, the English mesmerist, by placing under control an elephant, Professor Conte awakened with a start. He intuitively knew that there was someone in the room. Lying perfectly still, he listened. Suddenly his

blood froze with horror. A tiny disk of light played round the room, and finally rested upon the small table beside him. A moment later he heard a faint sound as of two substances coming into contact. Instinctively he knew it to be caused by his watch-chain tinkling against his ashtray. He broke out into a cold sweat. Moist with fear, he reviewed the situation. A burglar was in the room, taking his, the professor's, presentation watch and chain. The thought of

losing these, his greatest treasures, awakened in his mind the realization that he must act, and act speedily. With slow, deliberate movement he worked his right hand up to the pillow, beneath which he always kept a revolver. It seemed an eternity before he felt the comforting touch of cold metal. He withdrew the weapon with deliberate caution. The sound of someone tiptoeing about the room continued. Soft, stealthy movements that, however, no longer possessed for

him any terror. A fury of anger, a species of bloodlust, gripped him. Someone had dared to break into his flat. The situation became intolerable. With one swift movement he sat up, switched on the electric light, and cocked his revolver. An inarticulate sound, half cry, half grumble, came from the corner by the chest of drawers. The back of the head, looking curiously like a monkish crown, flashed into a face, swathed in what appeared to be medical bandages,

through which was to be seen a pair of eyes in which there was obvious terror. It was Bindle. Hands up or I shoot. Up, I say. Up went Bindle's hands. The professor did not recognize, his own voice. Suddenly he laughed. The ludicrous expression in Bindle's eyes, the unnatural position in which he crouched, his having caught the burglar red-handed, it was all so ridiculous.

Then there came the triumphant sense of victory. The professor was calm and collected now, as if the discovery of a burglar in his bedroom were a thing of nightly occurrence. There seemed nothing strange in the situation. The things to be done presented themselves in obvious and logical sequence he was conscious of the dramatic possibilities of the situation not so bindle this comes o takin advice of a daughter of the lord he groaned wonder what ordeals say in spite of his situation bindle grinned turn round and face the wall quick it was the professor's voice that broke in upon bindle's thoughts he obeyed with alacrity and the tonsured scalp reappeared

carefully covering with his revolver the unfortunate bindle whose first effort at burglary seemed doomed to end so disastrously professor conti slipped out of bed and without removing his eyes from bindle's back sidled towards a small chest at the other side of the room this he opened and from it took a pair of handcuffs a property of his profession put your hands behind your back he ordered with calm decision for one brief moment bindle meditated resistance he gave a swift glance over his shoulder but seeing the determined look in his captor's eyes and the glint of the revolver he thought better of it and meekly complied the handcuffs clicked and professor conti smiled grimly as he stood gazing at the wall bindle's mind was still running on what mrs bindle would say when she heard the news fate had treated him scurvily in directing him to a flat where a revolver and handcuffs seemed to be part of the necessary fittings he fell to wondering what punishment novices at burglary generally received he was awakened from his reverie in the contemplation of a particularly hideous wall-paper by a sharp command to turn round he did so and found himself facing a ludicrous and curiously unheroic figure

over his night-shirt professor conti had drawn an overcoat with an astrakhan collar and cuffs beneath the coat came a broad hem of white night-shirt then two rather thin legs terminating in a pair of red woollen bedroom slippers bindle grinned appreciatively at the spectacle he was more at his ease now that the revolver had been laid aside you're a burglar and you're caught the professor showed his yellow teeth as he made this pronouncement bindle grinned you'll get five years for this proceeded the professor encouragingly i was just wondering to myself responded bindle imperturbably the luck's wi you guv'nor he added philosophically fancy you avin handcuffs as well as a revolver sort o scotland yard this ere little ole suppose you get a touch o nerve sometimes an likes to be ready five years you said three was my figure p'r'aps you're right it all depends on the old boy on the bench ever done time sir he queried cheerfully professor conti was too intent upon an inspiration that had flashed upon him to listen to his visitor's remarks suddenly he saw in this the hand of providence and at that moment bindle saw upon the chest of drawers one of the professor's cards bearing the inscription

professor sylvanus conti hypnotist and mesmerist thirteen audrey mansions queen's club west kensington london west he turned from the contemplation of the card and found himself being regarded by his captor with great intentness the ferret-like eyes of the professor gazed into his as if desirous of piercing a hole through his brain bindle experienced a curious dreamy sensation remembering the card he had just seen he blinked self-consciously licked his lips grinned feebly and then half closed his eyes professor conti advanced deliberately raising his hands slowly passed them before the face of his victim keeping his eyes fixed the while over the unprepossessing features of bindle there came a vacant look and over those of the professor one of triumph after a lengthy pause the professor spoke you're a burglar repeat it i am a burglar echoed bindle in a toneless voice the professor continued you tried to rob me professor sylvanus conti of thirteen audrey mansions queen's club west kensington by breaking into my flat at night in the same expressionless voice bindle repeated the professor's words good murmured conti good now sit down bindle complied a ghost of a grin flitting momentarily across his face as the professor turned to reach a chair which he placed immediately opposite to the one

on which bindle sat and about two yards distant with his eyes fixed he commenced in a droning tone you have entered my flat with the deliberate and cold-blooded intention of robbing perhaps of murdering me it is my intention to write a note to the police which you will yourself deliver and wait until you are arrested now repeat what i have said in a dull mechanical voice bindle did as he was told for a full minute the professor gazed steadily into his victim's eyes made a few more passes with his hands and then rising went to a small table and wrote dear sir the bearer of this letter is a burglar who has just broken into my flat to rob me i have placed him under hypnotic control and he will give himself up you will please arrest him i will phone in the morning yours faithfully sylvanus conti sealing and addressing the letter the professor then removed the handcuffs from bindle's wrists bade him rise and gave him the envelope you will now go and deliver this note he said explaining with great distinctness the whereabouts of the police station

bindle was proceeding slowly towards the door when the professor called upon him to stop he halted abruptly show me what you have in your pockets bindle complied producing the presentation watch and chain a gold scarf-pin a pair of gold sleeve links one diamond and three gold studs in a diamond ring he omitted to include the professor's loose change which he had picked up from the small table by the bedside for a moment the professor pondered then as if coming to a sudden determination he told bindle to replace the articles in his pocket and dismissed him having bolted the door professor conti returned to his bedroom for half an hour he sat in his nondescript costume smoking cigarettes he was thoroughly satisfied with the night's work it had been ordained that his flat should be burgled and he sylvanus conti professor of hypnotism and mesmerism seizing his opportunity had diverted to his own ends the august decrees of destiny he pictured mr william gibson reading the account of his triumph in the evening papers he saw the headlines he himself would inspire them he saw it all not only would those come back who had forsaken him for the english mesmerist but others would also want him

he saw himself a star turn at one of the west end halls he saw many things fame fortune a motor-car and in the far distance the realization of his great ambition a scientific career in a way he was a little sorry for the burglar the instrument of fate throwing off his overcoat and removing his slippers the professor switched off the light got into bed and was soon asleep chapter two read by don w jenkins rancho san diego california shaggybark blogspot dot com