Chapter 10
Section 10 of Captain Billy's Whizbang, Volume 2, Number 19, April 1921. For more information or to volunteer, please visit LibriVox.org. Recording by Alan Lawley. Captain Billy's Whiz Bang Volume 2
Number 19 April 1921 By W.H. Fawcett Strolling with Jane Guites The Smith Crappley Wedding
He Who Hesitates By Jane Guites The moon is responsible for many things So is the back seat of almost any automobile Instead of wading through the usual tiresome description of the perfect summer's eve,
let us draw our own conclusions of moonlight scenery and peep into the cozy little sedan belonging to Ken Coniston, the hero. As no two women in the world are identically alike, we can give them all a write-up, and the heroines will be somewhat dissimilar.
anyway just because the two occupants of the back seat happen to know that old mr moon man is johnny on the spot is no reason to claim that his rays are any too bright and as you can't see the girl to advantage i'll tell you about her of course she is beautiful every heroine must be but hers is an unusual sort of beauty that is made up of large brown eyes
tawny hair and adorable red lips Ken knows the way of a man with a maid and he is not wasting precious time by talking of the weather sweetheart he whispers tenderly
as he draws her closer to him wonderful little girl I love you and I want you to yes yes she interrupts excitingly remembering from mater's advice to waste no ammunition
on lame ducks and realizing that ken is far from being lame you want me to as he hesitates a pained look creeps into his eyes and just as she is congratulating herself on her vamping ability he concludes his promising little speech with I want you to damn that flea
scratch my back the smith crappily wedding what's up? asked the foreman of the composing room as he entered the sanctum for copy
and noticed the editor's swollen forehead broken nose puffed red eye and tattered dusty coat did you fall downstairs?
No, snapped the editor, pointing to a paragraph in the paper before him. It's on account of the Smith Crappley wedding. It ought to read, Miss Crappley's dimpled, shining face formed a pleasing contrast to Mr. Smith's strong, bold physiognomy. But look how it was printed.
And the foreman read, Miss Crapple's pimpled skinny face formed a pleasing contrast to Mr. Smith's strange, bald physiognomy. Smith was just in here, continued the editor, as he threw his blood streaked handkerchief into the wastebasket. End of section 10.
